Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Ulrika meets the man with the golden bum
Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail has an extensive archive of celebrities in compromising situations.

Back in 2007, Ulrika Jonsson was caught checking out a man in tight pair of golden knickers. The red-blooded tabloid suspected she was about ‘getting to grips with yet another toyboy’. However, it was soon decided that this was a false alarm. Golden knickers was a male model and so no competition to Ulrika Johnson’s other half.

How does Ulrika’s new ‘teenage’ body make real women feel – envy or just despair?
The Daily Mail’s Maureen Rice can’t stop staring at Ulrika Jonsson’s new ‘teenage body’ and doesn’t know whether to feel envy or despair.

Such a dilemma is a great excuse to republish several images of Ulrika, of a type most likely to please editor Paul Dacre and red blooded readers. We’re talking bikinis, low cut tops and tops that reveal how ‘top heavy’ she was.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.