Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

There’s nothing holy about that! Sports Illustrated model Kate Upton plays raunchy nun in sexy adaptation of the Three Stooges
When the publicity department at Twentieth Century Fox told Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail that Sports Illustrated model Kate Upton was to play a sexy nun in a raunchy remake of the three stooges, the red-blooded tabloid was delighted to plug the film… so long as some of those sexy nun pics could be shared with banana buffing readers.

‘Rather than the slapstick humour,’ reports hack Alanah Eriksen, who has seen the trailer, ‘viewers are more likely to be left open-mouthed by the incredible sight of Kate Upton in a bikini.’ And not just in a bikini… a nun in a bikini! That’s right, Kate Upton wears a bikini and nun’s headpiece; a clash sure to sent Catholic Daily Mail readers into confused sexual a frenzy.

Leaked Sports Illustrated photos show why Bar Refaeli is the world’s top bikini model
Paul Dacre’d Daily Mail team has obtained leaked photos of a Bar Refaeli photo shoot for Sports Illustrated that the tabloid claims show why she is the world’s top bikini model.

Most exciting for Daily Mail readers, one of the shots shows Bar Refaeli cheekily drop a bikini strap while being made up. Not surprisingly, given that this was a bikini shoot, she wore several bikinis that day.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.