Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

‘I never stuffed my manhood…. But Victoria loves me in long johns’: Golden balls David Beckham reveals his underwear secrets
Pictures of David Beckham modelling Armani underwear have sent the Daily Mail news desk into a tizzy as the team feverishly speculates over whether David Beckham is ‘stuffing his manhood’.

Now super hack Lucy Buckland has obtained a copy of the Daily Mirror and discovered that David Beckham has denied stuffing his underwear to enhance his package for the photos. The Daily Mirror scoop is a great excuse for Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail babes to pour over photos of David Beckham in his underwear and share some photos with lady readers.

In the jeans! Topless Gisele models denim range for Versace
When the marketing team at Versace asked Gisele Bundchen to pose topless in advertising for their new jeans, they knew they wouldn’t have to pay Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail to run the ads.

The red-blooded tabloid was delighted to reproduce the images of Gisele Bundchen topless for the delight of its many banana buffing readers. Hack Sadie Whitelocks took a very close look and found the images Gisele Bundchen topless in Versace jeans most seductive and provocative. As a bonus for the ladies, also featured is male model Ryan Barrett. Gisele Bundchen and Ryan Barrett embrace tightly in one shot and it all becomes a bit too much for Sadie Whitelocks.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.