Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

A rose by any other name… Hannah Waterman celebrates her slimline figure by going nude for the British Heart Foundation
Hannah Waterman has celebrated losing weight by stripping off to get the British Heart Foundation some free publicity… a stunt that has gone down well with Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail.

But the red-blooded tabloid was gutted when it discovered that Hannah Waterman might well have been naked buy her ‘modesty’ was hidden by a giant red rose. No matter, the hacks heading off the archives and found a Calendar Girls publicity photo to cheer up cheated readers.

Miranda Kerr strips off for her sexiest photo shoot yet
Barely a day goes by without Victoria’s Secret model Miranda Kerr featuring in the Daily Mail in no more than her undies or a bikini. So imagine how excited Paul Dacre’s organ got when GQ secured a nude photoshoot. That’s right Miranda Kerr naked in GQ!

Naturally, GQ’s public relations people were more than happy to help the red-blooded tabloid out, in return for a little free publicity to help the magazine’s sales.

Banana buffing readers get three good sized nude pics of Miranda Kerr, plus one of her in a surprisingly revealing denim jacket, but will have to splash out on the magazine if they want more.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.