Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Get a bra, Britney! Ms Spears shows too much front in unsuitable white top
Pictures obtained by Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail from paparazzi agency Big Pictures reveal that Britney Spears breasts tend to sag without a bra.

To make matters worse the red blooded tabloid reports that, ‘cold weather, combined with a thin cotton white top, showed her curves.’

Some Daily Mail readers were led to comment disappointedly that Britney Spears’ nipples appear to point in the wrong direction.

Kate Moss enjoys a drink and a cigarette as she sunbathes topless on St Tropez yacht
Once again Kate Moss is topless on a yacht and once again the paparazzi are enjoying the sun with her. This time it’s Big Pictures who have the long lenses extended on behalf of Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail.

Lizzie Smith gets to study the Peeping Tom style photos of Kate and friends making merry and let randy readers in on the action.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.