Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Louise! There are some things One shouldn’t Show that early in the evening
One Show host Louise Minchin was forced to hide her cleavage behind a vest, after she risked exciting too many banana buffers too early in the evening, reports James Tapper of the Daily Mail.

The red-blooded tabloid hack was agog at Louise Minchin’s low cut blue dress — a £1,000 Alexander McQueen — and gutted after BBC producers insisted she cover up. The BBC admitted Louise Minchin had a faced a dilemma before the show, opting to cover her cleavage with a vest borrowed from Christine Bleakley.

Newsnight’s Kirsty Wark upsets BBC viewers with her revealing short skirt
The Daily Mail’s upskirt shots of Kirsty Wark have proved particularly popular with banana buffers, so here’s a trip to the tabloid’s archives and the day Kirsty Wark flashed her legs in a short black dress on Newsnight Review.

Red-blooded tabloid hack Graham Smith stayed up late on a Friday night to get the screen grabs for Paul Dacre’s organ and proceeded to enter a fantasy world in which the BBC was flooded with complaints from viewers upset at the sight of 50-something mother of two, Kirsty Wark, wearing a short dress that revealed her legs.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.