Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Mel B celebrates her birthday with a Vegas pool party… and yet another barely there bikini
Apparently unconcerned at turning 34, Mel B got the blood pumping at Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail when paparazzi agency Splash turned up with some shots of her poolside Vegas birthday party.

Paul Dacre’s team particularly praised the ex-Spice Girl’s ‘killer curves’ and ‘enviable rear’. When she ‘busted some moves’ the tabloid hacks didn’t know where to put themselves and were in clear need of a cold shower.

Spicy Girl: Scantily clad Mel B prepares for debut in Las Vegas burlesque show
‘Clad in her underwear, smouldering against the velvet curtains, Mel B has replaced her alter ego Scary Spice with a new one,’ reports the Daily Mail, ‘Peep Diva.’

Unlike her fellow performers the former Spice Girl will not go topless, but she has showed off her ‘toned figure’ to promote Ultimo lingerie and Paul Dacre’s tabloid not only has the pics, it has made them available nice and large.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.