Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Big is Beautiful: Plus size model Tara Lynn stars in new H&M campaign
When the PR people at H&M sent some pics of over sized model Tara Lynn in their bikinis to Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail, tabloid hack Maysa Rawi was refreshed by the ‘proudly displayed curves’ hailing the ad campaign a victory for BBWs (Big Beautiful Women) everywhere.

As the obesity crisis takes hold, the fashion industry is, ‘recognising the growing demand for more fashion conscious designs when it comes to their larger sizes [and] the High Street chain is hoping to tap into the younger market,’ reports Maysa Rawi.

Tara Lynn bikini shots help women who can’t keep their weight down to feel better about themselves and no doubt please a sizeable segment of the banana buffing market, whose fetish is BBW.

Instant Body Fixer: Ultimo’s £41 underwear promises to give you the perfect hourglass figure
When the public relations team at Ultimo allowed the Daily Mail’s Maysa Rawi to try out their new Body Fixer, the tabloid hack could not have been more delighted.

‘Control pants and push up bras could be a thing of the past as Ultimo has come up with an all-in-one solution for body-shaping,’ said Maysa Rawi of Ultimo’s Body Fixer. For just £41 the body fixer boosted Maya Rawi’s tits by two cup sizes, flattened her podgy stomach and slimmed her waist. All with no visible underwear lines. Maysa Rawi reckons it will hide extra pounds put on over Christmas.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.