Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Topless Lara Stone models for Calvin Klein (again)
Model Lara Stone has stripped off and gone topless, much to the delight of Sadie Whitelocks of Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail.

‘Lying topless at the water’s edge it appears Lara Stone has a new man in her life,’ reports cheeky Sadie Whitelocks as she admires topless Lara Stone’s male model companion, Matthew Terry. Lara Stone may be topless, says the red blooded tabloid hack, but her husband, David Walliams, need not worry as Sadie Whitelocks reckons he’s not the type to make a move. Banana buffing Daily Mail readers have a choice of topless Lara Stone pics to enjoy, with and without Matthew Terry.

Fresh as a Daisy: Model Lowe goes topless in a racy shoot for Esquire and reveals her admiration for Lara Stone’s ‘massive’ assets
‘In the least suggestive picture from the shoot Daisy Lowe ‘wears’ a red top that has the front panel completely cut out – underneath that she is wearing nothing, but cups her breasts with her hands,’ salivates Marcus Barnes of the Daily Mail as he abuses the latest edition of Esquire… so red blooded readers don’t have to.

The Daily Mail team is delighted to have acquired some topless Daisy Lowe shots to share with readers and when the model began discussing other models’ bodies, Paul Dacre’s organ reached new peaks of excitement.

Revealing her admiration for Lara Stone, topless Daisy Lowe said, ‘She has massive tits. They’re amazing. So perky. Wow.’ And when Daisy Lowe is not topless, she likes to wear sports bras explaining, ‘They usually make my nipples very erect for some reason. My boobs are on the bigger side, so with normal bras all I want to do is take them off.’

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.