Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

From Laguna Beach to Miami Beach: Reality star Kristin Cavallari soaks up the sun in a barely-there bikini
Keen to exploit a profile raising opportunity, reality TV star Kristin Cavallari was happy to frolic before the long lens of Matrix Photos, reports the Daily Mail, while holidaying in Miami.

The would-be starlet showed off ‘her svelte figure’ by ‘bouncing down the beach’. Kristin’s ‘barely-there bikini’ did not quite malfunction, but neither did if fully support her assets. Phwarrh!

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.