Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Kelly Brook and Danny Cipriani turn up the heat on a romantic U.S. holiday
Back in August Kelly Brook and Danny Cipriani sizzled on holiday in LA and snappers from paparazzi agency Big Pictures were on hand to capture the scene for Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail.

Kelly Brook has always been a favourite of banana buffing Daily Mail readers and the red blooded tabloid was delighted to offer lady readers a chance to gawp at Danny Cipriani. The picture to get Paul Dacre’s team most excited shows Kelly apply ‘lashings of lotion’ to her ample boson, protecting her from the harsh LA sun.

Kelly Brook gives her fans a treat as she signs autographs in exceedingly revealing dress
Paparazzi agency Splash have managed to get up high for a money shot looking down Kelly Brook’s top with which to delight Daily Mail readers.

Brook’s, ‘low-cut knitted dress skimmed every curve, leaving little to the imagination,’ panted the Daily Mail as the photographers worked tirelessly to capture a compromising image.

On the strength of these pictures, the red blooded tabloid expects ticket sales for Calendar Girls, in which Kelly Brook appears naked, to rocket.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.