Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Blood, orgies, nudity… Sneak peek at the Spartacus epic that is ‘too rude for British TV’
John Hannah plays a starring role in Spartacus: Blood and Sand, an American TV series so rude ‘campaigners’ are calling for it to be banned in Britain, says Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail.

But banana buffing readers need not worry as the red-blooded tabloid has obtained a series of stills from the Spartacus public relations team with which to titillate readers.

Should the show get the go ahead in the UK, viewers will be treated to scenes of orgies, nudity and violence — including John Hannah — that is guaranteed to excite Paul Dacre’s organ all the more.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.