Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

A girl for all seasons: TOWIE’s Maria Fowler gets set for a steamy 2012 as she poses for sexy calendar photo shoot
Summer may not yet be over, but Georgina Littlejohn, a rising star at Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail is desperate to get hold of Maria Fowler’s 2012 calendar.

The star of The Only Way Is Essex appears in a series of sexy bikini and lingerie shots, some of which the red blooded tabloid has been able to share with banana buffing readers. Studying Maria Fowler with very little on has certainly sent Georgina Littlejohn’s pulse racing.

Fallen Angel Kelly Brook gains some wings but loses her clothes as she waits to be enticed down from heaven in saucy TV ad
When Georgina Littlejohn spotted Kelly Brook advertising men’s deodorant in her underwear, the daughter of the Daily Mail’s nuttiest columnist, Richard Littlejohn, just had to grab some screen shots to share with the red-blooded tabloid’s banana buffing readers.

Fortunately for Paul Dacre’s organ, the Lynx public relations team were more than happy to share in return from some free publicity. Now Daily Mail readers may enjoy some saucy stills of Kelly Brook ‘show[ing] off her stunning figure in a suspenders and basque set… before turning on her heel and strutting off’ and watch a making of video featuring Kelly Brook and friends.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.