Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Action man Chris Evans shows he’s still got his Captain America abs as he strips off for photoshoot
Hollywood heartthrob Chris Evans has taken part in a photoshoot for Details magazine and Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail has bagged a copy so red-blooded readers don’t have to.

Hack Emily Sheridan is particularly into the topless pics of Chris Evans in a series of Action Man style poses.

‘It appears actor Chris Evans is maintaining his superhero figure, given his sculpted physique,’ drools Emily Sheridan as she admires Chris Evans naked abs. ‘During the interview, Evans was incredibly tactile and flirtatious with the stylist, make-up artist and interviewer, who seemed to be enjoying the attention.’

Sounds like Emily Sheridan would like Chris Evans to get active with her!

Corr blimey! Andrea shows off her blossoming baby bump as she hits the beach in a tiny black bikini
When pregnant Andrea Corr flaunted her bikini body while on holiday in the Caribbean, paparazzi from Splash were on hand to extend their lens on behalf of Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail.

And when hacks Sarah Bull and Emily Sheridan saw the pics, they knew they must share them with the red-blooded tabloid’s army of banana buffing readers. The pair read in the Daily Telegraph that Andrea Corr is happily married, which is nice.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.