Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Amy Winehouse can’t help but admire her assets as she soaks up the sun in Brazil
Georgina Littlejohn, daughter the Daily Mail’s nuttiest columinst, Richard, could not hide her delight when paparazzi from Splash captured of a series of shots in which a bikini-clad Amy Winehouse fondles her ‘her surgically-enhanced chest as she relaxed in the sun in Rio de Janeiro’.

Says the excited Littlejohn junior: ‘Winehouse, 27, grabbed her boobs, which were bursting out of her new Missoni bikini… She fondled her £35,000 bosom as she lounged around… her friends, staff and security barely flinched as the Rehab star kept her hands firmly on her breasts as they ate lunch and shared a laugh in the scorching heat.’

No scorching heart for Georgina Littlejohn, who could do no more than come over all inappropriate while sitting at her cold desk in London.

Sorry girls, we men just don’t find your Silicon Valleys sexy
Cosmo Landesman, of Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail, loves boobies and gets the assignment of his career putting together a boob job special featuring Danielle Lineker, Victoria Beckham, Melanie Brown, Amy Winehouse, Katie Price, Dannii Minogue, Alicia Douvall, Kym Marsh, Sharon Stone, Sharon Osbourne, Demi Moore, Christina Aguilera and Lindsay Lohan.

Having seen Danielle Lineker’s tits pop out, Cosmo Landesman was inspired to (more…)

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.