Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Ali Bastian and Brian Fortuna spend their THIRD holiday together since Strictly
‘Ali Bastian and Brian Fortuna have barely parted each other’s side since they crashed out of Strictly Come Dancing,’ reports Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail which reckons they’ve had THREE holidays since getting knocked out… and it looks like Mr Paparazzi has been with them on each occasion.

Red-blooded readers are invited to admire Ali Bastian’s ‘toned figure’ and Brian Fortuna’s pecks in a series of Peeping Tom style shots. Most of the commentary has been lifted from a recent edition of rival tabloid, The People.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.