Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

Party-loving WAG Abi Clancy exits awards bash falling out of her dress with a mysterious lipstick mark on her chest
When paparazzi agency Xposure Photos turned up at Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail with photos of Abi Clancy with a ‘mysterious lipstick mark’ on her breast and a ‘hello boys’ expression on her face the tabloid newsroom went wild.

Lucky hack Chris Johnson got to annotate the resulting image of Abi Clancy, ‘dressed for the occasion in a very low-cut black criss-cross dress that barely contained her curves.’

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.