Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre

‘Still in love’: Sex addict David Duchovny and Téa Leoni get touchy-feely on Malibu beach
Perhaps recognising a kindred spirit Paul Dacre’s Daily Mail goes relatively easy on David Duchovny and Téa Leoni: he’s a sex addict apparently.

Nevertheless, whatever sympathy Paul Dacre and his team may have for the sex addicted is no excuse not to click to enlarge images from Splash of the pair looking buff on a beach.

Kelly Brook and Danny Cipriani are reunited… on yet another holiday
Kelly Brook’s quick thinking boyfriend Danny Cipriani quickly came to the celebrity’s aid when her bikini bottoms came loose on holiday, but was too slow to prevent snappers from Big Pictures capturing the moment and selling on the pics.

The cry, ‘CLICK TO ENLARGE!’ soon went up among Paul Dacre’s team at the Daily Mail, who rushed an order for a full set of pics of Kelly wandering around in that orange bikini, lying poolside and so on.

Buff the Banana with Paul Dacre is a work of satire that diaries titillating stories from the Daily Mail, so you can go straight there without having to view the offensive stuff.